Stiff SEEZ55 (October 1984)
WEA Records 244 494-2
Enigma 4XT-73225
Lyrics for above album
TRANSMETROPOLITAN
In the rosy parks of England
We'll sit and have a drink
Of VP wine and cider 'til we can hardly think
And we'll go where the spirits take us
To heaven or to hell
And kick up bloody murder in the town we love so well
Going transmetropolitan
From the dear old streets of King's Cross
To the doors of the ICA
Going transmetropolitan
We'll drink the rat's piss, kick the shite
And I'm not going home tonight
From Brixton's lovely boulevards
To Hammersmith's sightly shores
We'll scare the Camden Palace poofs
And worry all the whores
There's leechers up in Whitehall
And queers in the GLC
And when we've done those bastards in
We'll storm the BBC
Going transmetropolitan
From Surrey Docks to Somers Town
With a KMRIA
Going transmetropolitan
We'll drink the rat's piss, kick the shite
And I'm not going home tonight
From a 5 pound bet in William Hills
To a Soho sex-shop dream
From a fried egg in Valtaro's
To a Tottenham Court Road ice cream
We'll spew and lurch, get nicked and fixed
On the way we'll kill and maim
When you haven't got a penny, boys
It's all the bloody same
Going transmetropolitan
From Pentonville Road on a sunset eve
To the beauty that's Mill Lane
Going transmetropolitan
We'll drink the rat's piss, kick the shite
And I'm not going home tonight
This town has done us dirty
This town has bled us dry
We've been here for a long time
And we'll be here 'til we die
So we'll finish off the leavings
Of blood and glue and beer
And burn this bloody city down
In the summer of the year
Going transmetropolitan
From Arlington House with a 2 bob bit
To the Scottish shores today
Going transmetropolitan
We'll drink the rat's piss, kick the shite
And I'm not going home tonight
THE AULD TRIANGLE
A hungry feeling
Came o'er me stealing
And the mice were squealing
In my prison cell
And that auld triangle went jingle-jangle
All along the banks of the Royal Canal
Oh! To start the morning
The warden bawling
"Get up out of bed, you! And Clean out your cell!"
And that auld triangle went jingle-jangle
All along the banks of the Royal Canal
Oh! the screw was peeping
And the loike was sleeping
As he lay weeping
For his girl Sal
And that auld triangle went jingle-jangle
All along the banks of the Royal Canal
On a fine Spring evening
The loike lay dreaming
And the sea-gulls were wheeling
High above the wall
And that auld triangle went jingle-jangle
All along the banks of the Royal Canal
Oh! the wind was sighing
And the day was dying
As the loike lay crying
In his prison cell
And that auld triangle went jingle-bloody-jangle
All along the banks of the Royal Canal
In the women's prison
There are seventy women
And I wish it was with them
That I did dwell
Then that auld triangle could go jingle-jangle
All along the banks of the Royal Canal
WAXIE'S DARGLE
Says my aul' wan to your aul' wan
"Will ye go to the Waxies dargle?"
Says your aul' wan to my aul' wan,
"I haven't got a farthing.
I went up to Monto town
To see Uncle McArdle
But he wouldn't give me a half a crown
For to go to the Waxies dargle."
What will ya have?!
I'll have a pint!
I'll have a pint with you, Sir!
And if one of ya' doesn't order soon
We'll be chucked out of the boozer!
Says my aul' wan to your aul' wan
"Will ye go to the Galway races?"
Says your aul' wan to my aul' wan,
"I'll hawk me aul' man's braces.
I went up to Capel Street
To the Jewish moneylenders
But he wouldn't give me a couple of bob
For the aul' man's red suspenders."
Says my aul' wan to your aul' wan
"We got no beef or mutton
If we went up to Monto town
We might get a drink for nuttin'"
Here's a nice piece of advice
I got from an aul' fishmonger:
"When food is scarce and you see the hearse
You'll know you have died of hunger."
BOYS FROM THE COUNTY HELL
On the first day of March it was raining
It was raining worse than anything that I have ever seen
I drank ten pints of beer and I cursed all the people there
And I wish that all this raining would stop falling down on me
And it's lend me ten pounds, I'll buy you a drink
And mother wake me early in the morning
At the time I was working for a landlord
And he was the meanest bastard that you have ever seen
And to lose a single penny would grieve him awful sore
And he was a miserable bollocks and a bitch's bastard's whore
And it's lend me ten pounds, I'll buy you a drink
And mother wake me early in the morning
I recall we took care of him one Sunday
We got him out the back and we broke his fucking balls
And maybe that was dreaming and maybe that was real
But all I know is I left that place without a penny or fuck all
And it's lend me ten pounds, I'll buy you a drink
And mother wake me early in the morning
But now I've the most charming of verandahs
I sit and watch the junkies, the drunks, the pimps, the whores
Five green bottles sitting on the floor
I wish to Christ, I wish to Christ
That I had fifteen more
And it's lend me ten pounds, I'll buy you a drink
And mother wake me early in the morning
And it's lend me ten pounds, I'll buy you a drink
And mother wake me early in the morning
The boys and me are drunk and looking for you
We'll eat your frigging entrails and we won't give a damn
Me daddy was a blue shirt and my mother a madam
And my brother earned his medals at Mai Lei in Vietnam
And it's lend me ten pounds and I'll buy you a drink
And mother wake me early in the morning
On the first day of March it was raining
It was raining worse than anything that I have ever seen
Stay on the other side of the road
'Cause you can never tell
We've a thirst like a gang of devils
We're the boys of the county hell
And it's lend me ten pounds and I'll buy you a drink
And mother wake me early in the morning
And it's lend me ten pounds and I'll buy you a drink
And mother wake me early in the morning
SEA SHANTY
Dear dirty London in the pouring rain
I wish to God I was back on the sea again
Though that belongs to the world of never will be
There was never a wilder bastard than me on the sea
I could fuck all the whores in damnation me boys
Though they wriggled and hollered and made a great noise
Then I'd drink till I stank and then drink plenty more
And I won't go down to the sea any more
But if I had ten pounds then I'd raise a loud cheer
And I'd toast all me neighbours both distant and dear
And I'd shoot back great belly-crippling buckets of beer
And a pox and a curse on the people round here
Wouldn't give you me the price of a half pint of beer
Wouldn't give you me the price of a cup of good cheer
A pox and a curse on the people round here
A man's ambition must indeed be small
To write his name upon a shithouse wall
But before I die I'll add my regal scrawl
To show the world I'm left with sweet fuck all
And when all of us bold shithouse poets do die
A monument grand they will raise to the sky
A monument made just to mark our great wit
A monument of solid shit now me boys
I met with Bill James we fought over crusts
I called him a whore and he booted me crotch
Then we shared out the jack and we thought it a treat
The compliments pass when the quality meet
The compliments pass when the quality meet
The compliments pass when the quality meet
The compliments pass when the quality meet
DARK STREETS OF LONDON
I like to walk in the summer breeze
Down Dalling Road by the dead old trees
And drink with my friends
In the Hammersmith Broadway
Dear dirty delightful old drunken old days
Then the winter came down and I loved it so dearly
The pubs and the bookies where you'd spend all your time
And the old men that were singing
When the roses bloom again
And turn like the leaves
To a new summertime
Now the winter comes down
I can't stand the chill
That comes to the streets around Christmas time
And I'm buggered to damnation
And I haven't got a penny
To wander the dark streets of London
Every time that I look on the first day of summer
Takes me back to the place where they gave ECT
And the drugged up psychos
With death in their eyes
And how all of this really
Means nothing to me
Now the winter comes down
I can't stand the chill
That comes to the streets around Christmas time
And I'm buggered to damnation
And I haven't got a penny
To wander the dark streets of London
Every time that I look on the first day of summer
Takes me back to the place where they gave ECT
And the drugged up psychos
With death in their eyes
And how all of this really
Means nothing to me
Now the winter comes down
I can't stand the chill
That comes to the streets around Christmas time
And I'm buggered to damnation
And I haven't got a penny
To wander the dark streets of London
To wander the dark streets of London
To wander the dark streets of London
STREAMS OF WHISKEY
Last night as I slept
I dreamt I met with Behan
I shook him by the hand and we passed the time of day
When questioned on his views
On the crux of life's philosophies
He had but these few clear and simple words to say
I am going, I am going
Any which way the wind may be blowing
I am going, I am going
Where streams of whiskey are flowing
I have cursed, bled and sworn
Jumped bail and landed up in jail
Life has often tried to stretch me
But the rope always was slack
And now that I've a pile
I'll go down to the Chelsea
I'll walk in on my feet
But I'll leave there on my back
Because I am going, I am going
Any which way the wind may be blowing
I am going, I am going
Where streams of whiskey are flowing
Oh the words that he spoke
Seemed the wisest of philosophies
There's nothing ever gained
By a wet thing called a tear
When the world is too dark
And I need the light inside of me
I'll walk into a bar
And drink fifteen pints of beer
I am going, I am going
Any which way the wind may be blowing
I am going, I am going
Where streams of whiskey are flowing
I am going, I am going
Any which way the wind may be blowing
I am going, I am going
Where streams of whiskey are flowing
Where streams of whiskey are flowing
Where streams of whiskey are flowing
POOR PADDY
In eighteen hundred and forty-one
The corduroy breeches I put on
Me corduroy breeches I put on
To work upon the railway, the railway
I'm weary of the railway
Poor Paddy works on the railway
In eighteen hundred and forty-two
From Hartlepool I moved to Crewe
Found myself a job to do
A working on the railway
I was wearing corduroy breeches
Digging ditches, pulling switches
Dodging pitches, as I was
Working on the Railway
In eighteen hundred and forty-three
I broke the shovel across me knee
I went to work for the company
On the Leeds to Selby railway
I was wearing corduroy breeches
Digging ditches, pulling switches
Dodging pitches, as I was
Working on the Railway
In eighteen hundred and forty-four
I landed on the Liverpool shore
My belly was empty me hands were raw
With working on the railway, the railway
I'm sick to my guts of the railway
Poor Paddy works on the railway
In eighteen hundred and forty-five
When Daniel O'Connell he was alive
When Daniel O'Connell he was alive
And working on the railway
I was wearing corduroy breeches
Digging ditches, pulling switches
Dodging pitches, as I was
Working on the Railway
In eighteen hundred and forty-six
I changed my trade to carrying bricks
I changed my trade to carrying bricks
To work upon the railway
I was wearing corduroy breeches
Digging ditches, pulling switches
Dodging pitches, as I was
Working on the Railway
In eighteen hundred and forty-seven
Poor Paddy was thinking of going to Heaven
The old bugger was thinking of going to Heaven
To work upon the railway, the railway
I'm sick to my death of the railway
Poor Paddy works on the railway
I was wearing corduroy breeches
Digging ditches, pulling switches
Dodging pitches, as I was
Working on the Railway
GREENLAND WHALE FISHERIES
In eighteen hundred and forty-six
And of March the eighteenth day,
We hoisted our colors to the top of the mast
And for Greenland sailed away, brave boys,
And for Greenland sailed away.
The lookout in the crosstrees stood
With spyglass in his hand;
There's a whale, there's a whale,
And a whalefish he cried
And she blows at every span, brave boys
She blows at every span.
The captain stood on the quarter deck,
The ice was in his eye;
Overhaul, overhaul! Let your gibsheets fall,
And you'll put your boats to sea, brave boys
And you'll put your boats to sea.
Our harpoon struck and the line played out,
With a single flourish of his tail,
He capsized the boat and we lost five men,
And we did not catch the whale, brave boys,
And we did not catch the whale.
The losing of those five jolly men,
It grieved the captain sore,
But the losing of that fine whalefish
Now it grieved him ten times more, brave boys
Now it grieved him ten times more.
Oh Greenland is a barren land
A land that bares no green
Where there's ice and snow, and the whalefishes blow
And the daylight's seldom seen, brave boys
And the daylight's seldom seen.
DOWN IN THE GROUND
WHERE THE DEAD MEN GO
Hello boys I've been away on a bit of a holiday
To the land where the rivers freely flow
And the cattle roam on the wild callagh
Walking home three parts pissed
I fell and rolled in the morning mist
I fell and tumbled in the hungry grass
That tells the tale of a terrible past
I screamed and rolled and dreamt I fell
Down in the depths of a freezing hell
Gonna wrap me up and take me away
Four million people starved to death
Could smell the curse on their dying breath
Where no one ever wants to go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
To hell which is circular all around
Down in the belly of the big cold ground
The moving shadows were everywhere
The very trees seemed to bend and stare
I remembered the dunes on a Sligo shore
Ran and screamed 'til I could run no more
Over the hill and across the moor
I ran in the house and slammed the door
Just what the hell's that over there
A putrefying corpse sitting in that chair
One place I don't want to go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Been drunk as a skunk since I've been home
From bar to bar like a ghost I roamed
I can't forget those things I saw
Been down with the devil in the Dalling
One place I don't want to go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
Down in the ground where the dead men go
KITTY
Oh Kitty, My Darling, remember
That the doom will be mine if I stay
'Tis far better to part, though it's hard to
Than to rot in their prison away
'Tis far better to part, though it's hard to
Than to rot in their prison away
So softly he kissed her pale lips
'Twas the same story over an o'er
Hush mavourneen, the police are watching
And you know that I must go ashore
Hush mavourneen, the police are watching
And you know that I must go ashore
In a day now I'll be over the mountain
There'll be time enough left for to cry
So good night and God guard you forever
And write to me once you get by
So good night and God guard you forever
And write to me once you get by